In Another Time and Place

I was correcting papers and realized that despite the activity I was, and for some time had been, remembering another time and place.  It was White Plains a long while ago.  The sense was of the happiness with which those memories began and this time no sadness had to follow.

Sing Right Along

We can make light of the old ways and pretend we've grown beyond our heritage, but when the songs play we sing right along and are glad again to be part of the story and of its people.

Scaling Back Expectations

Maybe we could provide what people want even if they want only a single aspect of what we would rather provide.

Life's Background

Great events are only the background against which ordinary life takes place.

Welcoming Santa

According to the paper, now that it is November Santa will be starting his arrivals, coming to some towns and shopping malls by helicopter and to others in a fire engine.  He is to parachute into some places and to others he will be driven.  A bit less dramatic, he seemed more welcome when arriving only once and then in his sleigh.

Walking Away

There are places where we need to stand so we can say we have come back to them, and that we can also walk away.

Responding to the spectacular requires no faith

Just Being

We act as though life can be complete only under certain circumstances.  It might be more satisfying and offer greater joy were those things so, but life is always complete just for its being.

Stature of Not Knowing

There is a certain stature attained in not knowing most of the celebrities featured in the Thanksgiving Day parade. It is not unlike reading People magazine and wondering who were they.

Competitive Entertainment

They even have competitive entertaining and so the cleverest remark is significant, as is the most devastating response, the hardest time given, and the more alliances made in this verbal combat.

Trust First

Trust is the environment in which change can happen, and without it there is no therapy.  Unless someone feels safe and is assured that while it may be difficult it can be worthwhile the therapy cannot even begin.  Trust is acquired not from what we say, though what we say (or do not say) can be an aspect.  It comes mostly from the atmosphere created, the sense that we will never hurt the person who is here to find healing.

People of Then

Being angry at people in our past is to be angry at people who no longer exist.  They were the people of then, so let them stay there.

Walking Instead

While the running start is impressive it leads usually to an exhausted finish and the intensity of the going left no opportunity to notice, much less savor, the scenery through which we passed.  Better to walk and sometimes stop, altering direction now and again and sometimes having none at all.

Only Words

People keep wanting him to be different than his words suggest we all should be.  They want him to say it is only words, and that once they are said we can all act as though we had done enough.  The saying was sufficient disclaimer, prelude enough to do whatever else we might wish.

Working Toward Nothing

The more we do, the less we attain -- no matter what we accomplish in the process.  We might instead make "nothing" the goal and so working hard will be eliminated, and we can then attain the serenity of "being."

Each Moment

Because each moment has unlimited depth, we have infinite time.

The Last Are First

Because they are last they are already first.  Because of their humility they have no need to be exalted.  Being the servant has made them the principle, the center.  Becoming is not the question.  Acknowledging what is adds nothing essential.

The Old Mistake

I made a mistake.  I've made it before.  I looked at pictures from when the boys were little.  We were together then and life was made of hope.  It was a time that won't come back and so I cried, as I do each time.  There is no way, nor inclination, to share this sadness.  No way not to wish it could not be then, and that the future would have been longer than it was.  It is not that today is empty.  In so many ways it is so very full, and it offers a different satisfaction.  All it lacks is that it is not then instead.

Mastering the Cliché

I am mastering the cliché.  I am becoming good at stating the obvious.  I have an ability to see what everyone else does, and to say so.  I do not even need to make it appear profound.  I do not even need to take credit for all this simplicity.  I think it may be progress.

Beginnings and Endings

That journey of a thousand miles -- the one that begins with the first step -- is not over until the last step has been taken.

Three Generations

At the wedding Bob stood behind Chris -- two blocks of an integrity and value that have never a need to be named -- and behind them it was not hard to imagine my father standing, the third block of which they are built:  the generation before, the one who contributed to now, and through on into then.

Point of View

People exist as they are in themselves, a reality more essential than what they have in my perception.

God's Wars

They are preparing to fight and determined to have it be for religious reasons.  In India, Hindus and Muslims are gathering at a sacred sight for their sacred battle, while in Israel Jews and Palestinians at their sacred sight with what passes for holy zeal, their enthusiasm matched by Protestants and Catholics as determined to paint their hatred in shades of sanctity.  There is little reason to think any of them have understood God, no matter under which name they might call him.  "Holy" and "war" are terms that do not go together.  They are contradictory concepts, and it is silly to think God, who created the entire world, would have to think one spot more sacred than another.  If people are so determined to fight they would do well to do so under different auspices, giving it a more accurate name and attributing it to someone willing to have it be his.

Our Invitation

We are not invited to take up Jesus's cross, but our own.

Another Meeting

Another meeting with more talk, and more papers.  Time spent with nothing accomplished, and another scheduled so we can do more of even less in the months ahead.

Note to Therapists

No one wants to be told what he already knows.  He instead wants to be shown the significance of it, its application to him today, in the situation in which he finds himself and with the dilemma that makes it hard to penetrate the cliché.  No one in crisis wants a lecture that was of little value (true though it may have been) when life was more manageable.  Neither does anyone want to hear what he already believed before it wore so thin.  Respond, then, to the need that is rather than with the answer that is available.

A Walk In The Woods

We walked in the woods and woods have no form, and so nothing is expected of them.  There is no correct way for them to be in being as they ought.  It makes each step, each new view, an adventure, an occasion for discovery and so tiny seedlings are a wonder instead of just a plant and coming suddenly into a meadow can be like steps beyond time.

A New Way of Being Together

You have visited my dreams and there is no sadness in them, not even in the waking to find you are not here.  This is, in its way, progress -- not in the sense of acknowledging that distance and the still terrible loss, since that was always known.  Maybe it is in the satisfaction of being together in ways we could only wonder at so long ago, ways that make the absence different than it had been; and while it is less than we might once have wished it is not less than we now can offer.

Finding People In God

He writes of finding people in God rather than having to find them in him.  I am not sure of all this distinction might imply, but it does seem a more satisfying notion.

Assertiveness

He did not ask would they be interested in a change in career.  He instead said, "Follow me."